Ed Hunter: Things You’d Never Hear in a Recruitment Office

You hear a lot of things working in a recruitment office.

I often write these things down as inspiration for articles. But it’s the things that aren’t said which give a greater representation of the job.

I’ve jotted a few of these down to help your week go a little more lightly…

The stresser:

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The honest one:

“Oh don’t worry, I pull sickies all the time, I’ll call the client now and lie for you.”

The Decor Lover:

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The communicator:

“She might be the boss but she’s really calm and collected”

The newb:

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The flexer:

“If there’s one thing about you I admire it’s your protein shaker”

The pious one:

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The chatter:

“Corrr this 5 minute silence has been nice. Shall we carry on for another 10?”

The dreamer:

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The chirpy one:

“You know what? I love gatekeepers.”

The friend:

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The caffeine addict:

“Mmmm… what a delicious office coffee. I’m so thankful for this machine. I never buy Starbucks anymore”

The lover:

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The sleeper:

“Hey I might be a bit late tomorrow. No reason, just fancy a lie in lol”

The linguist:

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The voicemail leaver:

“Ooooh I love this personal voicemail recording, how original”

The joker:

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The candidate whisperer:

“Nah don’t worry about the interview no-show. I do this to get raises too”

The nice guy:

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The base-jumper:

“Guys if a Rec2Rec calls for me, I’ll take it in the boardroom”

The Resourcer:

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The sober one:

“Do you think anyone will notice if we’re drunk this afternoon?”

The Diplomat:

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The fashionista:

“These loafers are so versatile.”

The code breaker:

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The misguided one:

“Do you think the boss will either love or completely adore, these new flip flops?”

The hugger:

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The focused one:

“Actually I think I’ll read this non-work related WhatsApp on my lunch break thank you very much.”

 Fairly obviously, you’re never likely to hear any of the above statements in a recruitment office.

But ask yourself this… would you want to?

Here’s something else for you.