A long time ago I posted a status asking who in the entertainment world you thought would make a good recruiter and as always, you guys came back with some outstanding comments.
Recently I was thinking about it myself, and thought I’d write a little blog with my thoughts on the question.
Admittedly, some of these guys wouldn’t make the best recruiters, but I’m sure you can relate them to characters in your office!
Let’s be honest – they can’t be worse than some of the people most of us have worked with! Here’s my 5 male characters, with the top 5 females to follow shortly!
I’ve been around enough to work with a few guys just like Jay. Natural over-promisers and under-achievers.
You would hear him across the office on a BD call bragging “Have I recruited in finance before???…. Have you heard of Richard Branson?.. Yeah.. Well I placed him didn’t I…”
Obviously he would fall wildly short on delivery, but it would definitely make the days go faster!
All of Jay’s Bullshit moments
“Ed, recruitment is very much like making love to a beautiful woman. You can’t rush it. Make sure that you have agreed terms, concentrate on the delivery, and ensure that you have impressed enough to get repeat business.”
Swiss Toni could sell a retainer to anyone using one of his famed analogies – he’s a born salesman and would be a ‘thought leader’ within weeks of starting. Come to think of it he would probably be better than some current ‘thought leaders’.
“Riding a Bike is very much like making love to a beautiful woman….”
I am often heard saying “do people think I can just pull CV’s out of my……hat?”
Potter literally could!
So (and excuse me whilst I publicly out myself as a Harry Potter nerd here), if I could wave a wand and cast “Accio….. sh*t hot and underpaid compliance candidate on 1 weeks notice period” out of nowhere – I could pretty much retire tomorrow.
Also, It would be nice to drop a bit of truth serum in a candidates tea before the interview! As long as it wasn’t used on me during pipeline meetings.
http://tomriddlestory.blogspot.com/ Harry summons his broom during the first task of the Triwizard Tournament ( from the Harry Potter Magical Trading Cards website http://harrypotter.tokenzone.com )
Derren is my obvious choice in the “real people” category. If you watched him program that persons mind to think they were murdering someone, imagine what he could do with a phone and a decent ATS system!
He’d be making calls to pick up an AP accountant role and by the time he hangs up the phone, the client would have fired the whole management team and retained him to run the search for their replacements!
TV illusionist Derren Brown ‘persuades’ two ordinary women to push a stranger off a roof… but could you be talked into MURDER?
Gill is the quintessential useless recruiter.
I’d like him to sit opposite just to spur me on when I think my day is going badly, to be quickly reminded that it’s not bad at all! Here’s my favourite clip of Gill that reminds me too much of a recruiter I worked with previously.
if you read those graces, this is the ultimate Brian-as-ol Gil moment.
Also, wasn’t Olly Murs a recruiter?! Keep an eye out for 5 females!
Until next time…Ed.
Senior Recruitment Consultant at Signify Technology
Client Consultant - Early Careers Team at Freshminds
Recruitment Consultant - Isle of Man at Boston Link
Trainee Recruitment Consultant at Monarch Recruitment
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