Motivational quotes on LinkedIn. Sometimes they motivate me. Most of the time they motivate me to delete the contact who shared them. If I knew where they lived they may motivate me in to casual violence.
Before you state the obvious, yes I know that I am one to talk… considering I am a Wolf recruiter that posts stories and memes (I hasten to add with actual relevance to working recruitment life mostly).
When I am recruiting however (or trying to scroll to the latest Ed Hunter post) I cannot help but stop and stare at some. Not because of their timely brilliance, but because they have to be some of the worst posts I have ever seen on any social media platform! And I used Bebo long after it was no longer cool!
Are there seriously people out there that get motivated by a picture of Ghandi and a phrase he almost certainly never said?
I’ve compiled a list of my favourites – I’d love for you to tell me how inspired/motivated these get you!
A little bit torn on this one. Firstly her shirt is spot on. Naked Surfing is something I condone (in the right conditions)…
HOWEVER… This was posted by a 57 year old male HR Director on my personal connections list who happens to work for a Fortune 500 company – who I truly hope I never see surf naked.
I did wonder, if I worked for the business that he does and I ended up in a disciplinary for being overly friendly with the new intern… would I get off if I used this fantastic quote? Probably not.
Advice: My advice to people sharing this one… throw the tie away… get yourself to a nature reserve and be one with nature. Or just go naked surfing. Probably not in the UK though.
Observation: Who amongst us is taking parenting advice from the LinkedIn community? At the time the original poster put this up did he or she think… “you know what I reckon I can change lives with a single click of this ‘share’ button”.
Advice: (For the poster) The sort of person that needs this advice is not on your LinkedIn news feed… They’re too busy sending their 9 year old in to the shop for a pack of cigs, while they send out Candy Crush requests and line up next door’s dog to babysit in time for their important meeting with Jack Daniel’s.
Observation: This reminds me of those chain emails that were sent round when email was a new thing to the world. Having said that I did forward every one I got, and so far I’ve avoided 7 years of bad sex, escaped serious illness, and dodged that gipsy curse that was promised.
This one does astound me however… It doesn’t even have a motivational quote or seemingly even a purpose!
Advice: For the love of god stop liking this stuff. Also, what is supposed to happen when I repost this as requested? Does it stop raining? Does the dog get a scholarship to an MBA program? Anyway I didn’t, I was too busy booking flights to Nigeria to pick up my lotto winnings.
Observation: Let’s kick off with the fact this is definitely not even a fact AND that guy is definitely not a billionaire. Just a man in a suit.
According to Forbes there are currently 1,694 Billionaires in the world – which means 1355.2 of them don’t have a degree. How do you get .2 of a billionaire?! It’s a little like me posting “54% of billionaires inherited their fortune” – so make sure your parents are rich before being born. Also are people liking this because they haven’t got a degree??
Advice: The guy who liked this on my newsfeed still owes me 50 notes from about 4 months ago. Liking this post will not mean your bank balance goes up by the time you next check it. You’ll still be overdrawn and the rent is still due on Friday! Also you still owe me 50 quid!
Observation: Here’s a list of people that have supposedly said this quote:
- Nelson Mandela
- Michael Jordan
- Colonel Sanders
- Simon Cowell
- Richard Branson
- Leonardo DiCaprio
- That fella he portrayed in Wolf of Wall street (who shall remain unnamed)
- Mother Theresa
- Henry Ford
- Oprah Winfrey
- Napoleon Bonaparte
- Albert Einstein
- Amelia Earhart
- Wile E. Coyote
Advice: It is possible to lose! Like when your friends lose the plot, or your number, or their desire to speak to you ever again because you constantly post shit like this! Also how many points for a ‘learn’ in the premier league?
Because I’m an “outside the box thinker” and someone who sticks two fingers up the the system, I wanted to include some memes or quotes that should really be on LinkedIn instead of the dross I normally see.
Here’s a collection of my favourites.
(Poster creds to http://despair.com)
And finally, a “motivational quote” from me…